This weekend we went to Wales for a few days with friends. It was so nice to have a break together and we had a wonderful time. We all came back fired up and full of new memories. We also came back with bag loads of stuff to be unpacked and washed, and even bigger bags under our eyes thanks to several late nights combined with the 4 month sleep regression.

So I knew yesterday wasn’t going to be easy. Going from 4 adults back to just me, and dealing with tired kids to boot. Plus the weekend is when we usually smash through the housework and the To Do list, so going away always puts us on the back foot for the week ahead.

I went for an avoidance tactic so that I didn’t have to think about the mountain of washing. We spent much of the day at the park with friends. It wasn’t relaxing. Okay, it was really stressful. There were too many different play areas and Eleanor and Fraser kept running to different ones. Highlights included a random dog walker having to help Eleanor down from the top of a climbing frame because I was running after Fraser in the opposite direction, not being able to help Fraser who was hobbling towards me after he’d banged his knee because I was half way through changing Nate’s nappy, and feeding Nate whilst pushing Fraser on a zip line. Then the inevitable crash happened and I got us back to the car with Nate in the pram, Eleanor on the buggy board and Fraser on my shoulders.

We got home and there was more of the same (a missed potty and poo on the floor, a crying baby who wouldn’t be put down, a painful blister from too small sandals that just had to be worn…). I was close to snapping. Then I realised that part of the problem was the avoidance tactic. And the mountain of washing. And all of the many, many other things that needed doing.

So I put the baby in the sling, cancelled plans to go back out, and largely left the older children to their own devices. Then I used a tactic that works for me. I do a housework job (tidy one room, put a load of washing away, empty the dishwasher etc) and alternate it with a To Do list job (label school clothes, order party bags, put photos on wall etc). That way I feel like everything is moving forwards a bit and when the kids want me to play with them, I feel more able to abandon the jobs and have fun with them so then they are less demanding as well.

The mishaps didn’t stop (burnt pasta, blue paint on the dining chair, falls off various things…) but we were all happier and calmer for me just getting on with some stuff and not trying to entertain them all day.